"Looks"

There is a girl in my hostel, who is constantly nagging about the way she looks. "I wish my nose was smaller. I wish my skin was fairer. I wish my hair were thicker.." and so on and so forth. This has impelled me to ask the question: How important looks are? Also, who decides, who looks better or worse, and who are we to judge the "beauty" of an individual? All of us, on this Earth are creations of the Almighty, and complaining about one's own looks, is like questioning His creativeness and art. The way we look is not in our hands to change (unless, offcourse, you take plastic surgery into account) and so we must be thankful for whatever outward appearance He has given us.

However, there are many much more important things which are in our hands. Have you ever thought how fortunate you are? There are hundreds of people dying of hunger. I have a friend who cannot see. There are so many who lost their parents at a very young age and so many who have never seen their mother. There are so many who need help. Reach out to them, try and make a difference and when you see the smiles which your effort brings, the importance of physical appearances will indeed be diminished to nothingness.

One more question has hit me. How important are "looks" in a relationship? Well, in these times, when the meaning of the word "relationship" itself has become unclear, it can be noticed that there in fact are many relationships which are based on looks alone. This, however, is not important because the kind of relationships I am talking about are the real ones.. the ones which thrive on love. So the question is "How important are looks for love to exist between two people?" Well , at this point it may be appropriate to differentiate between "love" and "attraction". While it is possible to be attracted to the outer appearances of a person, loving that person requires much more. At least, this is what I think. Love needs a much more solid basis, a deeper connection , friendship, trust and respect. A relationship based only on attraction will ultimately perish. Moreover, love does not feed on "looks" . For instance, suppose that there is a girl, very beautiful and you fall in love with her. And suppose she also starts loving you and you both are together, for say, six months. But then, one day she meets with an accident and is no more beautiful. Will you stop loving her? If you really love her, you won't. You would still love her like before. I believe that love has to do much more with the soul than the body... Once you are in love with a person, looks do not matter. You get so habitual to that person and you are so compatible and comfortable with that one person that you can give away everything (including outward beauty) just to be with him/her.